Pokemen RedMen Editionz
Chapter 1
I fucking love pokemon, it was my favorite console. I only played it on the computer using a emulator because reasons. Now I want to play Gameboy in my pokemon. WAIT SHIT SHIT, I wrote the trollpasta wrong, let me restart it. I fucking love
pokemon, it was my favorite game. I only played it on the computer using a emulator because reasons. Now I want to play Pokemon in my GameBoy, but the problem was, I never had a Pokemon cartidige. Now some reason. I heared a glass break sound, I went outside to buy Pokemon Red. but when i went outside, I saw a pokemon cartidge. For some strange reason the. The cover looked very bery weird cause I am cool. Wait I mean, cause I dont know. Fucking stupid me. Alright cheeky scrubs. Let me send you the picture of the cover, just wait. just gotta set up the camera. Andddd!
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Yep, you saw it. The title of the cover was writed like a fucking idiot wrote this to make it creepy. So, I got my Gameboyizille. Put the cartridge in. And I was ready to play the game. OK seriously? Is this a hack?
Because I saw minor changes, All the pokemon we're replaced with Charizard. And now, instead of "Red Version" it was "RedMen Version"
The trainer looked a little bit confusing.
I was spooped. Ok just let me take a screenshot of that, getting stuff ready's. adapter, PC, lightshot.
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Yep, you saw it, the title screen.
Now, I pressed a button, I heared a laugh, a fucked up laugh.
Now it gave me some options, the options we're:
NEW MEN
CONTIMEN
3X1T
Ok seriously, what the fuck happend to the game? 3X1T? I tried pressing 3X1T but the problem was, it didn't let me, when I pressed it, it gave me a message:
"..."
After, I was back to the option screen.
I tried to press Contimen, just to continue. It didn't fucking work. When I pressed the CONTIMEN option. It said
"F1L3 ̧͂̍ͦ͒͌ͩ̃̾̂̊̅͗͒͌̈́͝҉̴̰̻̙̬͈̘̕U̡̢̪̞͙͈̯̝ͤͣ̔̿̏̆̄ͣ̓͘͟͝Š̡̡̫͓̦̯͖̻̳̬̭̾̓̔ͤ́ͨ̕͘͝E̵̲̝̙̰̎̈́̓ͩ͘͡Ḓ͍̥̹̲͐ͩ̐̌̋̋̑̑ͤ̋ͮ̽͒̆ͣͪ͝ ̴̸̱̮̬̞͙̭̻͖͚͉̺͎̳ͭ̒̓͌ͬ͋ͪ͒̌ͮͭ̇͘͘͝ ̈ͩͭͨ̆ͪ̈́̓ͥ̍͒̍҉̫̥̣͇̟̻͎͈͓̥͉̩͕͚͍͜͢͝H̅̉̽͑҉̵̧̝̘̯̖̗͓̖̘͞Ė͑ͫ̾́̄̾͆̂͑̂̓ͣͧͨͭ̈ͮ͜͏̗̦̞̘L̺̺̫̲̬̞͉̜̹̥̝̘͕̎̍ͥ͂ͭ̆̾̐ͨ̔̆ͩ̽͊ͬͣ͑̒̕͟͡ͅP̴̘͚̫͎̼͚̞̺̂̓̒̐̓ͮ͐̀̀͜͡"
That was weird as a I faut. I pressed New Men, just you know, I want to play the fucking game.
Ok, I pressed New Men, I was with the message "Welcome to Pokeman's Redmen Edition."
I was at the house, no Prof. Oak, no helpful stuff. Just fucking nothing. I pressed to pause, now, his name was "Men". Huh? I taught he had no name since there was no Prof. Oak. I went downstairs, All the objects were gone, including Men's Mom. That was strange, I have gone outside, but, no people we're there, I think that's hyper-normal cause I dont give a shit. So, I have gone to the grass, still no Prof. Oak, OK, this is strange. I gone to the Pause menu and checked my Pokemen's that I had. There we're one, But, the sprite is missing. Strange. So I checked the Pokemen. It's name is : M3N'2 P3T
Seriously, M3N'2 P3T? Ok, I got on a fight with a Pokemen, the wild Pokemen was called : Fire.
The wild's Pokemen sprite was Fire, seems hyper-legit.
Ok, I picked M3N'2 P3T to fight with fire, so, now, it showed M3N'2 P3T sprite, huh? I taught he was a unknown Pokemen! His sprite, was the Charizard from the cover, OK, I tried fighting Fire, but any's M3N'2 P3T attacks were, not affecting Fire, Fire didn't do any attack, until 69 tries of attacks, Fire did a attack,
"Fire used '...' "
The screen cut to black, I heared the Lavender Town music. the screen faded back. And now I was at the Lavender Town route. But, Men had a different overworld sprite, he had no eyes, he had hyper-realistic blood bleeding from his eye's positions. Soon as I walked, the Lavender Town music was getting slower.
I paused the game, I checked his status. and...
He looks terryfing now, it's like, he's a bootleg penis. His name is now "..." , his money was unknown and the time...was....666:666
Seriously, did Satan hacked this game?
I am hyper spooked.
I wanted my boyfriend to rape me and give me a hug.
Now, I have gone to the cave from Lavender Town.... Ummm, the room was empty. The music was shut off.
As soon I walked to the end, I saw myself. What the fuck? So I talked to him, He said:
"k i is gonna kill you lololo"
Then he killed me, Hyper-Realistic blood came out, the game shut's off and a skeleton popped out of the screen. The end.
Chapter 2
Hi! Didn't expect me to come back, right? I did die, though. Had to search up "how do i resurrect myself" on Google so I wouldn't be dead. Meanwhile I was gone, I took my time to learn some English. Life has been going alright ever since, I had to clean out all of the hyper-realistic blood, which took me around 3 years.
Talking about the cartridge, I forgot to go to my session with NASA so I could throw the cartridge to Pluto. I tried searching for it like a couple hours ago and I have finally found it. It was in the Gameboy the entire time, I don't know why definitely i totally do not know why yes no no i do not know nope yeah no i do not know yes no know not know No Know not knOW Know ,sur jiriukshtgdfs
Sorry, my keyboard had a stroke. Anyways, I decided to do some research as to what this version of Pokemon is. Turns out, I am a special snowflake and I am the only one who has ever found this version of Pokemon! Smh, liberals.
I did not know what to do, I was still recovering from the fatal death I experienced, right now I look like a skeleton but that's besides the point, I decided to go ask Steve Jobs, the creator of Windows, from Google, to give me some good hacker warez so I can look into the games code. I went on https://twitter.com/i/notifications# and asked him for good hacker warez good. He said he will be arriving in 10 minutes with the good hacking hacker hack good warez good hacker.
10 minutes later, he arrived. He came with all of the goodies hacker, goodies hacker, g and I took all of it. I am such a madman. I took the cartridge out, put it in my DVD-ROM drive and opened my goody good Good Hack er. Once it opened the ROM, I realized that the hacker good hack software is using Assembly, the hardest programming language in the world. It's so hard only people with 100+ IQ can work with Assembly, but sadly, I only have 1 IQ. As a way to solve this, I decided to go back to school to improve my IQ. 50 years later, I finally did it, I reached the ultimate IQ no one has ever fucking seen. Ever. I had an IQ of 9,223,372,036,854,775,807. You heard me, an IQ of 9,223,372,036,854,775,807
. I went back to my PC, and I finally started reading the games code, line by line. The code though, seemed really unusual. After I finished reading the whole code of the game, my PC shutdown. I heard someone whisper "Super Mario In Real Life", I was extremely confused, and spooked ''(citation needed). ''I responded with "Spaghetti?". I decided to DM my friend who keeps on crying about how his trollpastas keep on getting deleted on Discord. I asked him "Do you know anything about Pokemon RedMen Edition?", but he did not respond with anything. 1 hour later, he responded, I decided to check what he said, and he just said "Super Mario In Real Life". Alright, is this some type of satanic ritual that I do not know of? I kept asking myself that until my computer turned on...
What.
The.
Absolute.
Fuck.
I only saw a fat kid. He was just staring at me, that's all. I asked him, "Who are you?". He did not respond. I asked him again. Nothing. I asked him, "What's happening?". He responded with, "You've been cursed, Spaghetti!". What? I, was cursed the entire time? I asked him, "What did I do to deserve this?", he responded "This is what you get for taking someone elses property.". ... ??? What? What did I take?, I asked him "What did I exactly take?", he responded with "The cartridge isn't yours.". Wh? Wha? What???
I am absolutely mad. I took the cartridge, and threw it to one of the neighbors. I went back to my computer, and the fat kid said, "You did the right thing. Now I must take your curse away.". My eyes blacked-out, and I woke up in my bed. Everything looked fine. I felt so glad I did not have to deal with this anymore.
Conclusion
Don't do drugs. Smh.